If you haven’t already, talk with your kids and/or partner about eye contact & connection. Share your observations from this month. If age appropriate, talk about whether you feel eye contact is an important family value or not. Ask them questions about it. Share insight from last week’s research.
Sum up what you observed & read this week. Write down your thoughts about how it applies to you and your family. List changes/goals you’d like to see happen within yourself, your children, your family, workplace, casual interactions, etc.
What about your children? Try a screen test with them. Write about what happens when you lovingly limit screen time and invite them to participate in activities. Or try limiting screen time and not suggesting anything. Which goes well? Better? What did your mommy instincts tell you before, during, and after this “test?”
Do you limit screen time in your house…for yourself? What would happen if you limited it? Today is about conducting your own experiment to see how limiting yourself affects your mood, work load, interactions with your children, original thought, motivation, etc. Write about it & be thorough, because tomorrow we are going to shift that screen test to our children.
In an AHA Parenting article I recently shared, the author suggests that for every negative interaction, we need five positive interactions to keep a relationship healthy. Think about your positive vs. negative interactions with your children? What would you say the ratio is? Are you happy with the numbers? Is there any you’d like to shift?
Do you find that making more eye contact creates a more cooperative household? Do your kids seem to be more willing to listen and follow directions when you make more eye contact?
Practice watching your children without interfering or correcting. Watch what a few moments of intentional observing bring to your thoughts and feelings about them. Then write about it. What did you feel? Admiration? Warmth? Annoyance? An urge to correct? Write about what they were/are they engaged in, how they speak, how they approach you and others. Look at the when, where, and how…and write it down.
Do an online search for how to connect more with your children. Janet Lansbury’s page is a great place to start. Write down any ideas that inspire you.
We’ve spent two weeks looking at ourselves and our families, but did you know that eye contact is so important that it is formally studied? There are literally different eye contact techniques. Spend this week researching them & other connection techniques.
Look back at your goals from the last few weeks (specifically days 1, 5, 6, 8, 9, & 10). Start your online search using your goals as a guide. There are so many online sources, using your own goals is a great way to narrow your search. There is no one-size-fits-all parenting philosophy, but there are many inspiring articles online. If you find a gem, share it with our group on Facebook!
I’ll be sharing a lot of articles by Janet Lansbury on our yayamamas Facebook page this month. If you aren’t familiar with her work, it’s incredible. It really speaks to me as a mom. I highly recommend you check her out—she makes positive parenting techniques accessible and easy to understand & implement. Some call her work “life changing” (I’m in that camp!)
Do you make time for one on one interactions with each of your children? With each member of your family? What could you do to connect more with each family member as an individual? Could eye contact alone do that?