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Tough Times

How do you show up for your friends during tough times? Times that are either centered around motherhood (i.e. infertility, miscarriage, death, illness, divorce, etc.) or around non-motherhood issues (loss of job, move, financial trouble, etc.)?

Does offering help or support come easy to you? What is your first instinct when reaching out…Words? Actions? Meals? Babysitting? Giving them space? How was caring for others in times of need modeled for you? What do you feel you are modeling for your children when it comes to helping others during tough times?

If it doesn’t come easy to you, who/what could help you with that? Online resources? Other friends? Have you ever thought about bringing this issue up within your circle of friends outside of a crisis time?

Vulnerability

A big part of friendship is being able to be vulnerable in front of others. Vulnerability, by its truthfulness, builds trust and connection with others. How easy is it for you to be vulnerable in front of people you know? What about people you have just met? Can you think of a time when you were vulnerable and it felt like it backfired? What about a time you were vulnerable and it led to relief or understanding? Do you feel like others can be vulnerable in front of you?

Show Up

A big part of friendship is showing up…in person to moms groups, lunch invites, parties, etc. When you’re invited to functions or play dates, what are your initial reactions? Are you excited to be invited? Nervous? Grateful? Overwhelmed?

Take a look at yourself and do an honest evaluation: are you happy with how much you show up? Are you flakey with plans? Do you feel like others can count on you to show up? When you RSVP “yes,” do you commit? If you’re overwhelmed, how could you make the commitment to invites less stressful?

Modeling

What do you model for your children when it comes to friendships? In other words, how do you talk about people when they aren’t around? Knowing that our kids are always listening and watching and that our actions speak louder than words…what do you think your child picks up on in your casual conversations about friendship? Do you gossip in their presence? Do you try to work out issues? Do they hear you talk about others? If so, how do you talk about them?

If you were to try and look at your friendships through your child’s eyes, what do imagine they see? Kindness? Fun? Joy? Stress? Insecurity? Growth? Honesty? Connection? Are you satisfied with your answers? Can you see both positives and negatives?

What You Offer

A huge part of friendship that is often overlooked is not what we get but what we give. What do you offer others in your friendships? Look at your list from yesterday. What on that list do you offer? Can you think of a specific time you offered those important qualities? Write about who and when.

Your Needs

What do you need out of friendships? Time together? A sounding board? Acceptance? Kindness? Unconditional love and support? Zero judgment? Authenticity? Trust? Dependability? Humor? Forgiveness? For someone to be easy going? Compassion?

What’s not on your list? Perfection? None of us are ever going to say or do the right things at the right times when we are around other mamas. Do you recall a time where you didn’t say or do the right thing in a social situation?

Criteria. Look at your list of needs for friendships. Which need is most important to you? Do you have criteria? (As a personal example, mine is basically kindness and commitment. Friendship to me doesn’t look like “x” amount of time spent together, it’s more a feeling of connection. I want to feel like people are walking beside me and not in front of or behind me. I don’t want to feel judged, just a feeling of mutual respect and growth). What surprised you most on your list?

Real Life Friends List

What does your real life friends list look like? People in your family? Your kids? Partner? Mom friends? Work friends? Entire families? Individuals? List them by name and then at least one thing you admire about your friendship.

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Glacier 2022, our first RV adventure We caught t Glacier 2022, our first RV adventure 

We caught the travel bug in Glacier. 😍 Now we want to see all the parks & RV everywhere! 

Last fall we rented a travel trailer (to test out a trailer vs motorhome) and drove to Glacier National Park for a few days. We stayed at the West Glacier KOA… full-time travelers told us it is one of the nicest KOAs in the country and that we set the bar too high for a first trip 😂 

Stay tuned for more about our #roadschool adventures ⛰🚐
Align your actions and your values. It’s how tru Align your actions and your values. It’s how true change happens and where peace resides.

I was such a “good customer” with Target, they moved me to the front of the line to speak with a customer representative. I was referred to as a “frequent” for years. No more. I’m walking the walk and deleting everything Target from my life. If you feel convicted, stirred, or uncomfortable with the swift downhill slide of Target, I want to encourage you to sit with thise feelings…then align your actions and your values.
Imagine if more of us could see that living is lea Imagine if more of us could see that living is learning and learning is living. And that we spend our whole lives learning well past any graduation ceremony. The world would be a different place if we embraced and encouaged a #lifelonglearning mindset. Childhoods would be different…dare I say happier? Easier? More fruitful?  I’m not going to give up on the paradigm shift that is happening, one homeschool family at a time 🙏🏼 #realeducation #realeducationreform
I get asked ALL THE TIME…”Why Idaho?” Chri I get asked ALL THE TIME…”Why Idaho?” 

Chris & I are planning on sitting down and recording our “why” in an @elevatingmotherhood podcast episode (sorry it’s taken us so long 😂), but I’ll give you the short list. 

We were looking for a place that was:
1. Majestic (Maui is majestic…we were hoping for water and mountains and North Idaho has those things in spades) 

2. Homeschool Friendly (Idaho is the most free homeschool state in the USA) 

3. Freedom Loving (check!) 

We came to Idaho for those 3 main reasons and have discovered 100 more reasons to stay! The people, the community, the churches, the small businesses, the beaches, the lakes, the big sky, the accessibility to other places…the list goes on. It’s the people that touch us the most. We have been embraced by the community—I am overcome with gratitude. They show up in for each other in small and big ways. To be part of something this amazing has blessed us beyond beyond! 

So “Why Idaho?” Pull up a chair—I’ll our you a cup of PNW coffee—plan to stay awhile, because the list of reasons is long and amazing. ⛰☕️🥰

#idahome #mauitoidaho #homeschoolidaho #northidaho #idaholife
There was an election this week. I don’t miss an There was an election this week. I don’t miss an election. 🇺🇸 I vote in person out of conviction. I take my kids with me every time. I share the whole process with them so when it comes time for them to cast their vote, they won’t hesitate to let their voices be heard. 

The volunteers at our voting place are so kind to my family. They recognize us, encourage me as a mother, and dote over what “happy voters” we are. It makes for an incredibly pleasant and empowering experience. I’m so grateful to live in a place where voting is taken seriously and honored as the important responsibility that it is. It’s one of my favorite life tasks…which means it’s one of my favorite homeschool activities. #alloflifeislearning The conversations we have within our family about elections, issues, politics, and community is more inspiring than any conversation I’ve ever been coerced into in a school. 

From Kindergarten to Grad School, I always felt like my thoughts were being guided in one direction—that of a teacher or an agenda. It was one filled with peer pressure and conformity. As an adult and parent outside of that space I can see clearly how my opinions were guided by people who were not invested in me. They did not share with me in a way that instilled confidence  in who I am, what I *actually* believe, nor did they give me a spirit of knowing it’s okay for me to have opinions that are different than others. 

That ends with me. I’m doing things differently. I’m educating my children differently. Change doesn’t look like talk—it looks like action. And action is more do-able than most people would have you believe. It’s as simple as taking your babies with you to vote. It’s as do-able as having open conversations with your children (with lots of listening). There are many different ways to approach heated topics like politics and elections that don’t involve division and hatred…ways that include less talking and more action. Don’t be afraid to take action, mamas. Your growth, example, and bravery make the biggest impact 😘

#vote #idahovotes #homeschoollessons #lifeschooling #lifeschool #homeschoolmama #mamabear #lesstalkmoreaction #homeschoolidaho
Our Garden in the Burbs 👩🏻‍🌾🌱 We’ Our Garden in the Burbs 👩🏻‍🌾🌱

We’re not gonna wait until we have more land to start living an Idaho homestead life. 🥰 We’re filling pots, digging holes, keeping chickens, sowing seeds, and farming as best we can. People like to share the end results of their garden, but I figured I’d share this growing season’s humble beginnings 🥰

So far we’re growing echinacea, borage, yarrow, onions, garlic, strawberries, squash, zucchini, cinderella pumpkins, thyme, basil, jalapeños, bell peppers, dill, cucumbers, beans, raspberries, roses, lilacs, mock orange, rosemary, sage, & tomatoes 👩🏻‍🌾 

What are you growing? 😍🌱👩🏻‍🌾
Idaho Summer Vibes ⛰🤙🏼 *wait until then t Idaho Summer Vibes ⛰🤙🏼

*wait until then the end…we saw a baby 🐐 on the beach*

The last few days I’ve reflected on how grateful I am to be in Idaho. This is where my family is supposed to be right now. We are surrounded by beautiful scenery & beautiful people…just like we were on Maui.

It turns out the world is filled with beauty. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise 🥰 

#idahome #mauitoidaho #mauinokaoi #idaho #idahome❤️ #idahomom #homeschoolidaho #homeschoolfreedom #openroad #godisgoodallthetime #northidaho
Big cheesy I love being a mom grin…that’s all Big cheesy I love being a mom grin…that’s all you’ll get from me in Mother’s Day photos 😂

Happy Mother’s Day!!! 😘😘😘
I didn’t get what I asked for…the door was ope I didn’t get what I asked for…the door was opened 3 times. Even the cat is reaching under the door. 😂

I know this isn’t my usual encouraging post, but there are a lot of expectations around Mother’s Day. And as the planners, event coordinators, and celebrators in our homes, Mother’s Day can feel…all kinds of things. Disappointing. Extra. Frustrating. Cute. Messy. Grief ridden. Charming. Memorable. Did I already say disappointing? 

Mother’s Day disappointment is real. A lot of moms experience it. I just wanted to acknowledge that with a bit of humor. I wrote a blog post about it on my original blog years ago and it remains my top article. If I find a minute today I’ll try to link to it in my stories 😘

Wishing you a Happy Mother’s Day whatever kind of day you’re having 💜😘

Baby Tula

Tula
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